Disney’s woke warriors have done it again. They’ve taken another legendary Star Wars character and reduced them to a bumbling pile of uselessness – and that’s a phrase that aptly describes this series overall. The Book of Boba Fett is categorically dreadful in every way possible.
For a short while, I fell for the usual Disney tactics. Rather than focus on building a coherent story and strong character arcs, they threw together varying piles of garbage and coated them with nostalgia. This means the less critical fans are left happy with the flurry of content, satisfied with fleeting moments of glory that eventually crumble under the rubbish weighing them down.
After around three episodes, however, I was sceptical. After four, I was extremely worried. Five and six extinguished any dying hopes in more ways than one, and by the end of the season finale I wanted to claw my eyes out. The show really is that bad.
It quite literally has nothing going for it. There isn’t a single compelling character, there are no stand-out plotlines to be seen, and most of these problems stem from Disney’s obsession with making everything as inoffensive as possible. This is an issue we’ve already seen creep into the Marvel Cinematic Universe, dragging it and Star Wars further and further below their previously high standards.
Naturally, the show’s main character sums up this wokeness quite nicely. Boba Fett has always been a fan favourite, with his fleeting appearances throughout the first two movie trilogies making for eye-catching scenes.
He wasn’t as terrifying as the likes of Darth Vader and The Emperor simply because he wasn’t as powerful and didn’t have as much screen time (maybe we should have left it that way). However, when Vader himself tells you to calm things down (‘no incinerations’) then you know you’re a force to be reckoned with.
When Fett was reintroduced towards the end of The Mandalorian’s second season, he still looks to have that force; he ably guns down multiple enemies in an exciting team-up before setting up his own show by storming Jabba the Hutt’s palace, mudering everyone in his way and taking his place on the throne.
Come the start of the first Boba Fett episode, however, and he’s gone soft. In fact, he literally tells a number of fellow characters that he doesn’t kill or torture. What? In the timeline, he had been doing that mere days before.
Now, the show itself tries to set up Boba’s encounter with the Tusken Raiders as the reason behind his soft nature. After escaping the Sarlacc’s pit in typically boring fashion (we barely got to see anything after months of build-up), Fett is captured by the Tuskens and, like many before him, enslaved. They beat him, starve him and force him to work.
In typically woke fashion, we are suddenly encouraged by the show’s writers to feel sorry for the Tuskens. They are just another underrepresented minority group, it would seem. After he saves one of their own, the Tuskens embrace Fett into their culture and start to treat him as an equal. Did the writers forget that these mindless creatures were responsible for the death of Shmi Skywalker, mother of Anakin? Only God knows what else they did to her.
After some more mind-numbing scenes where Boba grows to like the Tuskens, he is eventually granted his leave and heads off on his own – no longer a merciless bounty hunter, but a considerate gentleman. Well, this might have made sense if it hadn’t all taken place BEFORE he murdered the whole of Jabba’s employees to steal the throne. The ignorance to detail here is baffling.
From then on, Fett is useless; the attempted character development during his time with the Tuskens is shocking and was never going to stand up. After that, he has the personality of a teaspoon. All he does is walk around the city, engage in dull bouts of dialogue and take part in some of the worst Star Wars fight scenes to date.
As if to futher cement Boba’s new position as a bumbling idiot, we are treated to a car crash of a scene where he comedically (ha ha ha) chases a small droid around a kitchen, clattering into pots and pans and making as loud a noise as the writers deemed funny. This is one of the most revered assasins in the history of the galaxy. As soon as this scene aired, I knew I wouldn’t be taking the series seriously.
If your main protagonist can’t stand on their own two feet, your show is destined to fail. The Book of Boba Fett’s side characters make things even worse.
Fennec Shand is just as bad as Boba when it comes to having the engageability of a piece of cutlery – her cringeworthy lines are teeth-grittingly awful (‘fire in the hole’ springs to mind) and she serves little purpose other than depositing exposition wherever she goes.
Whoever the idiot pictured below is (he is never named and is known simply as a majordomo) is quite simply the worst character in all of Star Wars. If Jar-Jar Binks is bad, then this guy breaks the scales. I don’t even know what Disney tried to achieve with him – he isn’t woke, he isn’t funny, the plot could exist without him, his actor is shocking and he looks like a badly designed Doctor Who character. He is pointless in every sense of the word.
The Power Ranger biker gang who come in early on, however, certainly are woke. It’s painfully obvious that Disney wanted to try and give us some strong characters from ‘under-represented’ backgrounds, and yet all that happened was they shoehorned in three or four useless idiots who offer nothing.
Take the start of the season finale, for example. Boba wants to retreat to his palace in order to fight from a stronger position with more allies, more weapons and better vantage points. One of the woke warriors immediately tells him it’s a ‘bad idea’, and when Boba asks why the other chimes in with a rallying call that she wants to stay in the town to protect the civilians. That doesn’t explain why anything was a bad idea – that’s lazy writing.
What the scene does achieve, of course, is the woke warriors getting some temporary authority over Boba in order to please fans who like that sort of thing. This is a bounty hunter who has operated at the peak of powers for decades – think about the kinds of tasks he’ll have performed in the past, and all of a sudden he is persuaded by these amateurs to stay right in the line of fire. It doesn’t make sense.
Another incomprehensible idea is Boba’s apparent unwavering loyalty towards the people of the city, Mos Espa. Throughout the season, he continually talks about his desire to protect ‘his people’. Take a step back and think, Boba – you have literally never met a SINGLE one of these people. What is with the show’s obsession with turning a feared villain into a spineless fool? He doesn’t know any of these civilians – why would he risk his life for them?
I mean, you come to expect these lazy writing tropes from a team of scipters who couldn’t even put together a discernible plot. This show was all over the place from start to finish, jumping from planet to planet, timeline to timeline, throwing random bits of nostalgia at the wall and hoping something would stick.
The first few episodes are particularly awful in this regard; we repeatedly spend around ten minutes in the present and then leap back in time, spending the majority of an episode in the past, before hopping back to current-day Boba – by which time we’ve forgotten most of what was going on before.
A simple solution would have been to spend the first episode or two explaining how Boba escaped the Sarlacc and got to where he is now, and then staying in the present for the remainder of the season. Jumping back and forwards in time can be intriguing when done well, but it wasn’t here. It came off as cheap and cheesy.
Just look at the blurb explaining what Chapter 4 will be about. It reads: ‘Boba Fett partners with Fennec Shand’. He has literally already been partnered with her for three full episodes and for a segment of The Mandalorian. That’s why the time leaps in this series don’t work – we already know what is going to happen, so what’s the point? Get this out of the way early on.
After four episodes, the show had gotten to where it should have been after two – at most. Then disaster struck.
Chapters 4 and 5 are, in isolation, very enjoyable to watch and are the best of the season. However, the number of problems this brings cannot be overstated.
For starters, these are Mandalorian episodes. Two full episodes of a seven-episode series about Boba Fett are dedicated to an entirely different character. As if things hadn’t been scattered enough, we now leave the primary protagonist for 98 whole minutes. How can these writers possibly think this is a good idea? By the time we come back to Fett, it’s the season finale. It’s bonkers.
Even more disastrous, however, is the fact that The Mandalorian’s third season is now ruined. The entire premise of this season was set up brilliantly; Din Djarin and Grogu had been separated, with the former off on his own again and the latter set to begin his Jedi training. What a series that would have been, with the two struggling in their isolation and longing to see each other again.
As Disney’s nostalgia-obsessed writers would have it, however, that idea was thrown into a blender, condensed into two episodes in a different series entirely and rushed through to make idiotic fans squeal in their seats. The pair are now back together just as they were when we last seen them, most likely set for a number of run-of-the-mill adventures again. Great.
Think about how bad this is. Luke Skywalker’s surprise cameo at the end of The Mandalorian’s second season was brilliant, and now it means nothing. Din Djarin took off his helmet for the first time in years just to say goodbye to his little friend, and they’re back together already. Whoever is behind that decision should be sacked on the spot.
Cad Bane’s introduction to live action at the end of the sixth Book of Boba Fett episode was excellent. Watching his famous cowboy hat come into focus was exhilerating for any Clone Wars fan, and his confrontation with the warden had viewers on the edge of their seats. Finally, we had a proper villain for Fett to deal with.
Naturally, with only one episode remaining, it was smart to assume that Bane was being set up as a ‘big bad’ for our protagonist to deal with throughout the coming years. Alas, no – the Disney woke warriors were more than happy to bring him in for another nostalgia bite and then have him lazily killed off less than one episode later.
Bane, one of the most revered bounty hunters in the galaxy, went out with a whimper. Having easily floored Fett and standing over him with a gun in his hand, the legendary assassin is somehow caught off guard by a stick and stabbed to what looks like death. Have these writers watched no Star Wars before?
Bane has literally fought off Jedi Knights during his lengthy career, evading their capture for years on end. And yet now, he is taken out by a beer-bellied Boba Fett who has nothing left in his armoury but a Tusken Raider spear. The imcompetence is astounding.
It just about summed up how painful the season finale was to watch, and it will probably go down as the worst Star Wars installment to date – and that’s saying something, considering the likes of Rise of Skywalker exist.
The fights are slow and look as though they belong in a particularly bad episode of Doctor Who (which is fitting, as the previously-scorned ‘majordomo’ is far too prominent in this episode, continually interrupting with his unfunny demenour at all the wrong moments).
We have far too much of the idiotic woman pictured below, who also heavily features in one of the Boba Fett-Mandalorian episodes – who knows where each of them start and end? She speaks far too much, cracking the same attempted jokes over and over.
The woke Power Rangers are given too many painfully cringey moments, with the writers doing their best to shoehorn in some heroic moments. Of course, the writers are dreadful – so you can guess how well that turned out.
They try far too hard to insert humourous line after humourous line into the final battle scene, and every single one falls flat. This is NOT what viewers want, Disney – this isn’t how fights work. People do not laugh in the face of death, they don’t stop for seconds at a time to test out new one-liners. Stop it now, please.
The Rancor is reintroduced (after we’d all forgotten about it) just to give Fett what we hoped would be a cool scene. Instead, he just lumbers about on its back while it takes out a few droids. There’s another issue, by the way – those idiotic droids. What a finale that is – a couple of space Power Rangers taking on two machines that must have been programmed so badly they can’t hit their target from mere feet away.
Of course, the heroes save the day. Fett has saved the civilians he knows and loves so much (oh wait), Fennec has snuck off to dispose of boring side villains (was her acting that bad she was told to stay off set for important scenes?) and Bane is dead. In short, there is nothing to set up a second season at all.
Every single villain of Fett’s is dead. Eveything is resolved in typical Disney fashion. So not only do we have no premise for a second season of Boba Fett, but we have also killed off The Mandalorian’s plans too. Jesus.
Disney’s writers have ruined another show. In all honesty, this article is a significantly narrowed-down version of events – from seven episodes, there is probably half an hour of good stuff. Most of that consists of nostalgia bate via Bane’s appearance, Luke Skywalker’s training and Mandalorian adventures, so those 30 minutes aren’t even something to be proud of.
Fett was reduced to a bumbling, overweight, useless protagonist with nothing interesting about his character whatsoever. In the space of one season, he goes from one of the most feared bounty hunters in the galaxy to a laughing stock.
Unhelpfully, he is surrounded by idiotic characters who offer nothing in terms of development or personality. They are all there simply to serve the story, spouting exposition and dreadful dialogue just to propel the plot – which, of course, was all over the place and never got going.
With several helpings of wokeness thrown in for good measure, Disney left us in no confusion with regards to where Star Wars is going. Gone are the days of characters we can invest in and plots that excite us; we’ve been well and truly ushered into an era where those are brushed aside in favour of pumping out content packed with nostalgiac moments that will earn them as much money as possible.
A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away, Star Wars was up there with the best of cinema. Now, it’s just like the rest of Disney’s woke nonsense – and I don’t see that changing any time soon. The Book of Boba Fett is just another chapter in an ever-worsening story.